Thursday, September 9, 2010

Friendly Friend of the Common Man

This had been on my mind for a while, is it a curse,burden or a blessing?

I don't know why, in my life, it seems to be quite apparent and true to some extent. That I have a tendency to associate better with the common man, the person on the street, the nobody. Rather than the elite, the prominent, the people who are viewed famous or important. This is also evident just in the observations of my friends, characters I hang out with in all settings, from church, work and just outside.

For some reason I'm not that comfortable with people who are comfortable. It maybe some issue in my life I need to be deal with, although mentally I know how to act proper. But my heart does bleed for the unnoticed, the unloved. They are seemingly more real than others.

Reminding myself of what Ian McManus once experienced. He was invited to a conference, where some of the top managers and leaders were asked to speak. Most people attended the meeting so that they can hear the CEO of Ford (or was it GM?) speak at that meeting. Ian was also invited to speak, and it was on building successful businesses through good leadership. Ian felt a bit out of place especially being a Pastor, but he decided to do it anyway.

The CEO spoke about three types of people.. A-type, B-type and C-type. A-type's are the brilliant, the sort of people your company needs to move it forward and will bring big business. B-Type are people who your company needs, their not brilliant, but we all need people to sweep the floors and do the toilets. C-Type are people you need to get rid off because they will pull the company down. Then he talked about the qualities of each and how to look out for them.

Ian McManus halfway during the CEO's speech felt like changing his speech, but really felt it was the Holy Spirit asking him to say what he had written down previously before. He stood up and talked about the underdog, and raising up the champion in all of us. Which is contrary to the CEO's speech.

He talked about the A-type. Yes, the people who has always been great in life, the talents. But the thing is that a great leader is one who gathers the C-type people, teach them, disciple them, and believe in them. He gave an illustration of a basketball game, where he trained up a bunch of kids who nobody thought they could do any better,the kids whom were always picked last. But he spent time with them, training them, and instilling belief again in them, and one day they finally took up the challenge and went against an A-Team. They still lost, but the margin was by 3 points instead of a expected disastrous defeat.


We love the underdog spirit. The person who everybody gave up on, the person who had no future, the person whom everybody despised and laughed at. And by the determination of the will, or by encouragement of a friend who stepped beyond himself, caused the underdog to rise up and proved the world wrong.

We all love it, however how rarely when we are put in the position or someone we know is in that position, do we rise up to the challenge and be it?

One great person I love is Jesus. Jesus took for himself a rag-tag 12, from fishermen of Galilee to the thuggish tax-collector. Jesus's dirty dozen. Indeed one fell, but the other eleven went on to live and die for a cause way beyond themselves and till this day, the same fire that burned in their hearts burn in ours today.


There was a man, who kill people. He was a murderer. A zealot, he believed in what he was doing was a righteous act. A man most feared and despised. His name was Saul. But when God touched him, he came to know Jesus as his Lord and saviour.

But even when he joined the communion of the saints, most didn't want to associate with him, how can you sit on the same table as the man who murdered your husband/wife/daughter/son?

And yet, Barnabas took up the role. To believe in Him. Barnabas was not his real name, but he was called Barnabas, which meant "Son of Encouragement". His whole personality radiated with encouragement and belief in people whom people has given up on.

And Saul went on to became Paul and wrote 2/3rds of the new testament. The mighty men of God whom did great and marvelous acts. The one who cried "But I will rejoice even if I lose my life, pouring it out like a liquid offering to God" (Phillipians 2:17), a man who lived and died for a cause.


The world like the prominents, the talented, the gifted. But the Lord doesn't look at the outward appearance but at the heart.

I need to look at even my own life with God's eyes. Especially when I put my life in perspective of many of my friends. For me to be doing security, when some of my friends are investment bankers, engineers and people of high positions. I feel like a fool at times. The years seem to go by, I feel like I've lived life harder than most, but still have not achieve more than most. Why is it that I have to climb 10 tree's to get a coconut when they only need to climb one? Why are the opportunities shut for me, but opened for them freely. It's as if, there is injustice in my world according to my eyes. But not according to God's eyes.

Can I believe that God is speaking to me? Encouraging me? Saying "I have not forgotten you John". That I am an underdog as well? We all love the dream of high-flyers, graduating with honours, coming out in big-named firms, big-checks and rising above and beyond their peers. We want to be them. But I am not them.

Like an eagle amongst the chickens, the Lord is saying to take a flight with Him, being different, going different paths, finding my own. Not living the life others live or going the way they go. But to find Him and His purpose in my life.

I feel at many times I am at crossroads, I feel like going back home, grass seems greener on the other side, people tell me I'm a fool, I don't know. Life seems so uncertain. But, I have only one certainty in life. Is that Holy Spirit.. you are with me. Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me. Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over.Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the LORD for ever.

Friday, April 23, 2010

The Foolishness of the Gospel preached

1 Corinthians 1:18-23.

18 The message of the cross is foolish to those who are headed for destruction! But we who are being saved know it is the very power of God. 19 As the Scriptures say,
“I will destroy the wisdom of the wise
and discard the intelligence of the intelligent.”[a]

20 So where does this leave the philosophers, the scholars, and the world’s brilliant debaters? God has made the wisdom of this world look foolish. 21 Since God in his wisdom saw to it that the world would never know him through human wisdom, he has used our foolish preaching to save those who believe. 22 It is foolish to the Jews, who ask for signs from heaven. And it is foolish to the Greeks, who seek human wisdom. 23 So when we preach that Christ was crucified, the Jews are offended and the Gentiles say it’s all nonsense.


Have you ever wondered about the Gospel message? Just think about it, from a critical, humanistic and rational point of view. Break it down into a single sentence, and say it.

"I believe in a man, born 2000 years ago claiming to be the Son of God, who walked on this earth, died on a cross, shed his blood, and rose again 3 days later and those who believe in Him as your Lord and Saviour will have everlasting life”.

Now, how logical does that sound? The truth is, we believe in a foolish gospel. Paul even says it, foolishness to the greeks, who seek human wisdom. Gentile’s says “It’s all nonsense”. From even my own rational mind, I would think it’s also nonsense.

But the bible says, verse 24 – Christ is the power of God, and the Wisdom of God. This foolish plan of God is Wiser than the wisest of human plans, and God’s weakness is stronger than the greatest of human strengths.

The last couple of weeks/months i've been talking to a colleague of mine who's an atheist. I personally have no problems about people having their own beliefs, but if there is a bible-pusher, theres also an atheist pusher. And he's one of those, I usually spend most of my time arguing with him, and the problem is that deep down he has no answers, and therefore the easiest answer is to blame God.

He may complain about the moral breakdown of the church, or even the divinity of Christ, but one thing that I had have him cornered is the person of Jesus. But regardless of how much he argues with me, I try and keep it simple, because at the end of the day, I've come to realization that it is the power of the Holy Spirit that convicts people to the power and revelation of Jesus Christ.

But nevertheless, during those times, it had got me thinking about the "Foolishness of the Gospel" in that Paul talks about.

I went back and thought about it, and asked God, how come are Gospel is so hidden? It makes no sense at the same time it does as well. And I felt God answered me, do you know what else is foolish aside from the Gospel? Love.

I wish I can give you a definition of love, but I can’t. Love is more than just an emotion, it’s also a choice and sacrifice. It’s something that we need to survive and cannot live without, but at the same time we understand it so little. We know we need it, and yet we don’t understand it.

The problem about guys is that we think more with our heads than our hearts. The thing about us guys, is that we always want to understand it before we can identify it and allow it to change us. And thats why I believe we are slower at times. But God has created us that way for a reason.

I think that’s also partly why we guys tend to disengage with our emotions because we don’t understand and eventually it affects our capacity to love. We live in a society where people are getting smarter but the divorce rates are getting higher. We’ve even learned not to fool others but also ourselves. Like how I was hearing Pastor TD Jakes saying about a women he had to council “Oh Pastor, I don’t understand, last week, he gave me flowers for our anniversary and made love but this week he wants a divorce”. We can have sex and not be connected, we can hang out with friends our entire lives and never truly know them.

Men can do the most cruel evil things, we can dehumanize people, turn apathetic to the cries of humanity. All in the name of logic. Think about Eugenics, the Spartans used to kill their weak and dying babies to create a society of warriors. The Nazi's did the same thing so that they're species can be strengthen. Even Evolutionism teaches about survival of the species. Love takes a back seat and becomes a chemical balance in our brains.

And yet, love is not logical. There is an element of faith in the impossible. Parents who would do anything to help their disfigured child, giving him the best quality of life possible. People willing to take care of the elderly, despite them not having really much hope or aspiration to achieve much more in life. We treasure things that isn't logical but we know its right, because we care.

Strangely today I was also reading an article on LiveScience on “Why women stay in abusive relationships”. How can women keep on staying on, the highest reasons is “Dependency and affection”. Somehow women can see some inch of light in his character. “Oh but he loves me, he’s so caring when he’s not angry or drunk”. How can you keep on in a relationship when he beats you?

This statement… “I believe I can change Him, or I believe He can change”. You know what that statement speaks off? Love and hope… faith. But faith without Jesus is empty, for it lacks the life-changing power of Jesus.

So love, it's foolishness...


Then it Hit me... Yes.. Gobsmack in the face.

This is what the Bible says Love is:

1 John 4:10 – And THIS IS REAL LOVE – not that we love God, but that He loved us and sent his Son as a sacrifice to take away our sins.

Do you know why the gospel seemingly irrational? Seemingly illogical? A foolish Gospel?

The Gospel is foolish. Why? Because GOD BECAME A FOOL FOR ME.

God took on the mortal coil of man, powerless and weak, and he took the place of the lost soul wandering around in the dark doing as his hearts desires headed for destruction, THE TRUE FOOL, Me.

How foolish is it to die for someone, knowing that they might never understand, they might never feel, they might never know how much you love them, and reject it, never to reciprocate to that love that He shed his very life for.

The Foolishness of the Gospel. Jesus became a fool for me. Because He willingly became a fool for Love.

"I believe in a man, born 2000 years ago claiming to be the Son of God, who walked on this earth, died on a cross, shed his blood, and rose again 3 days later and those who believe in Him as your Lord and Saviour will have everlasting life”.

Yes, He died for me. But the wisdom of God is higher than the wisdom of man.

JESUS ROSE AGAIN! Yes I Love Him, his name is Jesus, and I LOVE HIM!

1 John 15:12-13

12 This is my commandment: Love each other in the same way I have loved you. 13 There is no greater love than to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.

He became a fool for me, can I become a fool for Him?

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

2010 and beyond

I've been spending a little time just reflecting on 2009. To be honest, was feeling depressed about it at first, but what really got me up again was reading Keith Craft's blog. -

At most times, our perspective is really myopic. For some strange reason, we are more likely to remember the pains than the joys. 2009 has been an intriguing year.

It's been a year of more pain than I can ever remember, pain, loneliness and just sadness and darkness. It could be starting work really early, and ending the day really late. It felt like a long dark year, with a very dark and cold winter waking up at 4 or 5am's below 0 degrees, probably it felt elongated as I had a very bad second half of 2008 struggling with poverty, then 2009 It got better however there were very strong highlights of pain rather than joy, from fighting depression and the stone in my bladder.

It had been a year of disappointment followed by just times of lack of vision, I felt at times I was just going through the motions, living each day for the next paycheck, and not too sure what I even did with my money in all honesty.

Encouragement was hard to come by, and just felt like I wanted to sleep it all away.

There is a good tiredness, tiredness from a effecient and productive day. Then there is the fatigue from the lack of vision, where the reality of life is the tragedy that you have come to nothing, you just want it all to go away.

Being angry doesn't help, and struggle all you want, the waves are just too high, the current too strong, I felt like I was drowning.

Nevertheless, God wasn't far, it had been a season of being set apart. The life lessons on 2009 had been tremendous, especially a challenge to the things I once held to the core. Who I really am. I despise being a public success but a private failure. That I say "yeah I'm doing well", but in truth I'm hurting on the inside. The imploding feeling, that I just want to be away from anyone that when I do come to the end of self, I won't hurt you.

I am sick of the pretending and the masks.

I'm not saying you should wear a depressed look everywhere you go, but there is a power found in Jesus. Found in the secret place of spending time with the lover of my soul. The honest cry of the heart that I need You, as I cannot keep on living life as the way it is. Life is meant to be taken by faith, it is impossible to rationalize the plans and purpose, and just be faithful with what we have in our hands. The peace of God which lies inside, in the moments of just worship and pausing to hear the sweet small voice.

I had a vision, despite all the darkness that surrounded my heart, deep inside, I felt my heart was covered in darkness, just the anxiety and fear, but deeper still, was a throne, and Jesus sat on it, and He wasn't moved. That though the world, the devil, whoever try and sift me, God is there for me always, though I may be dangling before the abyss, He has me in his arms, He will protect my heart, protect my mind, and He is there for me always.

In dark nights of the soul, is where God can tear down the masks, and unveil the vulnerabilities, the holes. Yes, there is the warm love, the comforter Holy Spirit who passes by in the night and in the quiet time of the mornings. But I've learned that it is not good for man to live alone. Towards the end of 2009 it is also a year God has asked me to reinvest again into relationships.

Blessed are you who has friends who still believes in you even once you stop believing in yourself. Someone where you can be open and just be real. It doesn't mean you have to all the time moan about your problems, but someone who really cares about you, a friend that see's through your masks and won't stop being a pain till he gets down to the truth of the matter ,someone willing to not just be there by your side, but someone who can slap you silly and drag you by the toes out of the mire of self-pity and self-loathing, then set you again high with the encouragement, promises and prophecies.

It's not found only in one person, but I want a collective of small group of friends, who has the same pursuit and passions in life, living life together in Christ. Men and Women of God seeking Real Fellowship. In all honesty, I am still on that journey of finding them. But these kinds of fellowship doesn't start overnight, but through a life-long process, and I have to start somewhere.

Somehow 2009 was a year I opened up myself to pain. Not only mine, but of others. Somehow bumping into many many lonely and hurting people. At the end of this year, I feel the incredible necessity of having the Lord Jesus being Lord in my life. It is only in us being blessed are we able to bless others.

The world is hurting and dying, and we need the Kingdom Power of King Jesus manifesting here on earth through our lives, God can choose to use his angels, but He has given us His Children the specific job, and He has also imparted to us the Holy Spirit, the same power that raised Christ from the dead resides in you and me.


2009. I felt although it was a regretfully painful year. It was a year of tremendous growth, especially in my conduct and work ethic. More so, my integrity and character.

At the last church service, I was regretting the choices in this year. But I felt God was putting his hand on my shoulder and saying, that this year was the sweat and tears of a foundation of bigger things to be built on. The Foundation of a building has to be the strongest part of the building, and at times it involves being piled, speared by a giant metal rod for the sake of ensuring a deep foundation, to dig in deep to clean out the issues of the heart yet to be settled, to dig out the stones embedded into the heart.

2010, A lot of Pastors are proclaiming this is a year of double return and great favour. Even those that don't prophecy about these things are shouting from the rooftops and going out on a limb about this. I know our eyes are not meant to be on the year, but God does work in seasons.

I don't want to miss it. Not again. Lord, help me, let me be there to catch the wave, I want to be propelled into the destiny in which you have set before me, and I have to be ready. With You I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. It's going to be an interesting year.

Get ready get ready get ready get ready.

Monday, September 14, 2009

Jesus Christ is perfect theology

"Jesus Christ is perfect Theology." - Bill Johnson

This statement by Bill Johnson has been going off and off and off in my head again and again recently. It's a very intriguing thought with deep revelation and powerful repercussions in how we view life.

JOhn 1:17-18 - 17For the law was given through Moses; grace and truth came through Jesus Christ. No one has ever seen God, but God the One and Only, who is at the Father's side, has made him known.

JOhn 6:46 - Not that anyone has ever seen the Father; only I, who was sent from God, have seen him

John 14:6-7 Jesus told him, “I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one can come to the Father except through me. 7 If you had really known me, you would know who my Father is. From now on, you do know him and have seen him!”

"Jesus Christ is perfect theology. He is the answer to every question".

Everything that happens in our life, no matter the circumstance, if it doesn't line up with who Jesus is and what Jesus done, it's an imperfect answer to a bigger picture and purpose.


This thought has been going around in my head again. I guess probably its because I'm currently going through a stage of changing perceptions, and there are moments in our life where we need to perceive or see things as God see's things.

It's really hard to actually understand what God see's. Because He doesn't just think different than what you think, he is vastly very very different. I mean, just think about this thought "What does Jesus see and think about issues?".

Sometimes we feel that Jesus is like a machine, whatever God says, he says, whatever God does he does, but actually the bible says that he went through all temptations, trials and tribulations. He felt everything we feel, and he knows what we go through, and yet he overcame it all.

Jesus is and was a living breathing person like you and I, who think, breath and do everything the same we do, even go to the toilet. Jesus is the perfect example, he is the prototype of every Christian living on this earth in perfect relationship with God the father. He is what we are to be. He lived in perfect submission not as in control, but in submission, in a love submission of Father and Son.

Now, we are to live like Jesus lived. And I personally have a very difficult time phantoming what that means. Because it meant living in a realm where "Nothing is impossible in God". When Jesus looked at the 5 loaves and 2 fishes, he thought "This could feed the thousands.", can we look at the piece of bread on our table and think "This would end world hunger?".

Jesus is perfect theology. The issue about the old testament, is that God can be very wrongly perceived. One of the statements that my urban life member said "The God of the old testament is very scary". And yes, He is. Because He is great and mighty, greatly to be respected (feared). Because He is perfect, He is Holy.

And I think thats where the problem lies, in that the old testament laws were meant to display God's holiness and perfection. If you had a kid who rebelled, take him out and stone him to death.

But is God like that? Is He is person someone who wants you to stone your kid?

I think where thats the reason why Moses never entered the Holy Land when he hit the rock. God said "You did not represent me well". The character of God the father was tainted as a angry judicial distant God seeking to punish his children for their wrongdoings.

And I believe with all my heart, that is why Jesus was sent. To re-write the wrongs and put the perspective of God the father and who He is in person back into our hearts.

John 3:16 - For God SO LOVED...

How often do we talk about the Love of God? How often do we talk about the Love Jesus had? Jesus is the perfect representation of God the father. He is perfect theology. He loved the people, he came to cleanse the sick, cast out demons, he restored people and preached about the realities of the Kingdom of God, heaven here on earth.

Hence, we are to live a life in perspective of Jesus, with God's eyes on our life. If you have a sick child, our perspective is to believe "If Jesus is here today, He would be made whole, and Jesus is here today". The Spirit of the Living God, the one who raised Jesus Christ from the dead, the same Spirit that brooded over the oceans at the creation of this world is in everyone of us who believe. That things around us may be not going as they seem, but in the backdrop if we pray, God is setting you up for a victory, one so unassuming that it has to be only God, and thats what you call a miracle and not possible by our own strength.

Luke 4:18 - 19 (Amplified) The Spirit of the Lord [is] upon Me, because He has anointed Me [the Anointed One, the Messiah] to preach the good news (the Gospel) to the poor; He has sent Me to announce release to the captives and recovery of sight to the blind, to send forth as delivered those who are oppressed [who are downtrodden, bruised, crushed, and broken down by calamity],19To proclaim the accepted and acceptable year of the Lord [the day [l]when salvation and the free favors of God profusely abound.(G)

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Possessed by a dream

I had a friend today got a job, she got a great job in Singapore, to be honest, I'm really happy for her, but at the same time, just an inkling of sadness and/or jealousy as well. I guess to some extent, it's a bit harder to rejoice for someone else when your not in a entirely comfortable position yourself. But the bible does say, rejoice with those who rejoice, and mourn with those who mourn. The mature thing to do is to rejoice, and seek God for the breakthrough in your own life.

The moment I heard that happen, I felt in my own life, like the voices coming, questioning my current position in life, my choices and the path in which I've taken. It tends to come from time to time, and to be honest, it gets hard at times to keep your head up and continue continuing on.

I feel that is why, it's very important to always honour the words spoken into your life and continually listen to fresh revelation, or Rhema.

The last few years has been very interesting years, especially ever since coming to Melbourne and Planetshakers. God has been moulding my thoughts and desires, and my concepts and perceptions of the world.

Like I still believe the dream and the prophetic words of my youth, but also having to seek out God for how to get there. Too many times, we just praise God, but then go our own way, when God is wanting us to go His way. We believe in the end result, but we take our own path how to go there.

To be honest, I always question the road sometimes God is leading me. And I guess the hand of God tends to be always hindsight, therefore we live by faith and not by sight.

For example, I remember a very strong calling from God in 2007 to remain in Melbourne. And throughout 2008, when I was so poor, eating sandwhiches day in day out for so many months, just having to encourage myself was tough. I remembered many nights just felt like crying, but then re-reading again the bible verses that he had highlighted in my heart. Especially from the book of Jeremiah and Chronicles.

I really thank God for his presence though. There are moments where its all muddy and just I feel lost, but when I get into his presence, and faith fills the atmosphere, I feel as if the line of sight is clear again. I think thats why I really thank God for worship and praise. Especially in the dark nighs in my bedroom, just with the worship blasting through my headphones, and just standing there with my hands raised.

2009 has been better, though still at times I feel not there yet. And there are times I feel God is taking me around the mountain and not up and through the mountain. That the path he has set before me, is a quicker one, a short-cut, however it will be the path less taken, and I have to be strong and very couragous. Sometimes even foolhardy. If it takes me 10 years to get to my destiny and not 20, heck, I told myself I'll mop floors, scrub kitchens if it takes me, and ha ha, after Nando's, I do feel like I had a fair time doing those things. It may seem foolish to the eyes of the world, and even to myself.

Hence I feel like I always need to be connected to God, as tightly as possible, it's all about relationship, just like how Abraham brought Isaac up the mountain to sacrifice Him. Alot of times I know God is interested more in my heart and attitude, it doesn't take much for Him to just put me at the right place at the right time to be successful..

Like Joseph and his 4 P's. The Pit, Potiphar, Prison and Palace. God can move Joseph straight to the Palace, but I believe that there is a place and time for everything. What I believe is that Joseph learned to lean in to God wherever he was placed, and continued believing in the dreams of his Youth. He thought he would have been the ruler over his little family of 11, little did he know that God was setting him up for much bigger things, to be the Prime Minister of the most powerful nation of the time.

But I liked what one Pastor said, "When God blesses a man, does he gain a champion or loses one?". When I go into my security firm, at times that I'm so much more capable than this, but then just have to keep on reminding myself and seeing the good in everything that I do, like negotiating and just talking to people that I come across, believing that God is continually shaping my character to fit into the calling that he has in store for me. But God has really poured out his favour on me in both my jobs. And especially the security company has reached new heights, especially in terms of businesses and our clients tend to be very happy about our work.

So, yeah, just have to continue holding on to the promise, and just be faithful with whatever little I have in my hand. Like the story of the talents, I feel in the past I might have squandered it, God's Grace is continually over my life, so start afresh, forget the past and multiply it. I'm really believing in the more not only just next year, but also in the next coming weeks and months. What could is possibly be? I don't know, but I do believe it will be good and better than ever before.

Thursday, January 8, 2009

Investing in People (bit of a rant)

Just had been hearing a sermon by Erwin McManus about investing in people and was just amazed by the level of understanding and depth of wisdom concerning the topic.

Just looking back at my life, and thinking about some of the people I have invested in. My time, effort, just being there for them, driving out late into the night just to have a chat with them. Some with multiple returns and some with nothing whatsoever. It can be quite disheartening, but the people who do bring back fruits, it's really worth it.

I think thats the drive of pastoral care. That a person matures both spiritually and in his personality. The dream is to always help people find and pursue their destiny in Christ, finding their place in this world and with people of same likeness and mind. Hence, I love the Planetshaker Call "To Empower a Generation to win a generation".

I think the problem recently I've been having is not seeing people come to fruition. But these sort of things take time and prayer. Lots of prayer. Which I haven't been doing. Hehe. But even so, just have to keep on planting the seeds, and let God bring the rain.

The thing is sometimes I don't know whether the seeds that I am planting are even good. Like the bible says, wheat and the weeds. Words are powerful, and what kind of plant are you planting? I know God has given me some level of authority and charisma, in both my speech and my personality. The question is learning to be faithful, and living in integrity using the tools that God has given you.

And life, well, it is also a growing process for me. Things which I thought was right, I think maybe perhaps otherwise now. But yeah life is interesting. And I find the interesting part is that I grow a lot by mentoring people. Just wish I know more being able to impact people in a positive and better manner. Have to pray more for the keys to move hearts and minds.


I think aside from that, I also need to learn to invest in myself. Which I am really bad in. And like Erwin McManus says, hanging out more with friends who refresh me. I haven't really had that type of friends for a while, I think I might just be hanging out with the wrong company or not anyone at all at the moment.

Thursday, January 1, 2009

A Eulogy of 2008

Recently I've been questioning a bit about my mortality and legacy. Sounds a bit morbid, but just taking a moment of reflection, especially after I had a friend who had a bit of a cancer scare that reminded me of relatives and friends who are fighting the fight for their lives just made me put things back into a bigger picture of life in totality.

Yesterday I took a bit of time to think of several pointers to write a eulogy. Just questioning myself, how would I be remembered?

*Would I be remembered fondly? Or perhaps hated?
*Had people perceived me as happy, an encourager and a great companion to have around? Or moody and drains the life of everyone around them?
*Was I a friend to not only the loved but the unloved? The ugly, the disdained, the weird.
*Was I a giver? Or a Taker? Generous or selfish in both my emotions, finances, and even my friendship?
*How about Integrity? Do people believe in what I say? Had I lived up to my words? Do I keep my promises? Do I keep your secrets?
*Was I passionate in the way I lived my life taking risks and living a life of faith to achieve new heights? Or a coward and never amount to anything?
*Was I a dream-maker? Was I a source of encouragement? Did I even matter? Did I just lived to suck up all the life of everyone around me including resources from my parents and friends? Have I lived made a change in your life that you have lived for the better because of me?
*Did you ever see Jesus in Me?

You know what.. having a thought about this made me realise about insecurities, that it doesn't matter whether you were handsome, beautiful, hot, sexy, intelligent, rich.. or maybe even funny.

But it's not those things that you were, but what you did that left an impacting legacy of the man or woman you were. The imprint you left behind while you were on this world.

I don't have children yet, but I believe there is an inherent desire in all of us to live for a change, or live for something bigger than all of us, that if we don't succeed and finish the race, there will be others who will take the baton and run off where we left off. For Christians it would be the great commission.

Yeah, but just thinking of it, not before you die, but now, as you live. It challenges me to want to be different, to live my life differently. Like Jesus says, "Love Others". Where has the Love went? We Christ was the author of the Love Revolution. Why has the Hippies taken it over? And since when did the church resort back to Religion? I want to die, not with no regrets, but with a knowing that I lived a life of Love.


I believe Time is a blessing given by God. He created the days, the months,seasons and years. A year of jubilee, a year of new beginnings, a season of blessing and restoration.

Ecclesiastes 3;

1 There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under heaven:

2 a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,

3 a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,

4 a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,

5 a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain,

6 a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,

7 a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,

8 a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.

As we come to a close of 2008, I've just been reflecting, not that I'm dying, but 2008 is. Because it cannot be relived again.

To be honest, I never really cared about new years until recently. Zooming out of my life and seeing it from above with a macro view, I want to see how far I've come, where I'm going and reviewing the how to to get there. Mistakes are never fatal, Regrets are never helpful, But Mistakes are a teacher, and regrets are meant to propel you to make a change.

Just reflecting on 2008. Yes, I have made a lot of mistakes. But that's what a new year is for. To pick up yourself from the ashes and run the race anew leaving behind the dissapointments, the frustrations, the mistakes, the sadness, the pain, the stupid choices in life. It is a time for refreshment, a time for reconciliation, a time for forgiveness, a time for a change in perspective.

Hebrews 12: 1 - And let us run with endurance the race God has set before 12.

12 - So take a new grip with your tired hands and strengthen your weak knees.

13 Mark out a straight path for your feet so that those who are weak and lame will not fall but become strong.

Have a Happy New Year peeps. I'll See you all on the other side~!